The Big Heist

On Sunday I witnessed a crime. Sort of.

We had just walked out of the Best Buy, still on the sidewalk outside, when the door alarm buzzed and a skinny white dude blazed past us with two PS3s under his arms, the boxes still clad in those wired-to-the-outside-of-the-box security tag things. He dove into a shitty looking car which then streaked away into the parking lot while him and his companions in the car hooted victoriously. We looked back at the Best Buy but there was no response.

So this is the state of criminal mastermindery these days, wait until the door is open, then grab what you want and run. I wonder if they even bothered to scout the store ahead of time? When I worked at a chapters I did keep an eye out for suspicious individuals but we had security in the store so I didn't really worry about it much. I certainly wouldn't have chased a thief out into the parking lot. And I guess neither did the Best Buy door person, who had wished us a good day just moments earlier when we walked through those same doors. What is the function of that dude if its not security? Did that make my Best Buy experience any less latex glove?

I was further disgusted by the thought that since loser boy was stealing two PS3s, it wasn't even a case of stealing it in order to play with it, at least one if not both units would likely be on Craigslist by the end of the day. Forget planning your heist, you don't even need a fence anymore.

But then what really brought me low was to realize that I was the one who was in a position to see what happened, but it didn't even occur to me to look at their liscence plate before they were gone. I was busy looking at the Best Buy to see what their response would be. So I'm just another warm body in the herd of slack-jawed do-nothings that feed these parasites with our inaction. And you just know if the Best Buy had tighter security I would grumble about the inconvenience. I want big wide automatic doors so I can stroll in without being delayed, and the Best Buy is so dependent on my good will that they have to tolerate the odd grab and dash just to keep me pacified. And they just roll the cost of those losses onto the sticker prices and so really it costs them nothing as long as us cattle keep buying their "best".